Our Journey With Oligodendroglioma

June 18th 2019, I awoke , a beautiful day , my heart racing as I tip toe down the stairs to prepare our little family for the birthday plans ahead , it’s so exciting seeing beaming faces on their wonderful day , even more so for us, as we are a lucky few that have siblings sharing a birthday , and I knew this year that both the girls were extremely excited because only weeks before had I received a very Specific birthday list from both of the girls , and smugly I knew , that I had indeed got them everything their little hearts desired ! Id been waiting for today for many reasons , another year with these beautiful girls , my darling little family , excited giggles generated through the walls of our homes as they eagerly opened their gifts . Little legs crossed , confident smiles and widened eyes , id not missed a single thing out ! Go me !! The school run was the same as it always was, hectic but pleasant, unconditional loving hugs between siblings , my usual phrase of have a super day , my job was done .......

yet one little hand still clenched my hand as we left the school gates , I sighed , as much as I knew today was about the girls , I couldn’t shake off the hesitation within my grasp , this small little hand clenching so tightly , had been through So much already , peering down, this young man in front of me , this beautiful little boy was the biggest part of me. This warm hearted child gave me my title , he came into this world and he became my little hero , flashing back through the eleven years , we head towards the house , my words slightly jumbled and Shaking , whilst informing him it was time . My heart racing, palms sweating , a smile to visually reassure him, if only he knew what I was thinking , probably better he didn’t , I’m not even sure thinking back on it , I could establish what I was thinking , so many voices in my head , anxiety , fear, reassurance, hope , they wouldn’t stop! Let me breath ! The smell of any hospital instantly crawls underneath my skin, not through the fear of germs or uncleanliness , an instant sensory trigger to every appointment attended which lead to this moment . The sound of the tannoy , instantly brings forward memories and emotions of my late father , how he held my hand just , mirroring the grasp I had upon my son who unknowingly stood by me , I could see his social anxieties scurrying around his feet. We edge forward , every sign seems blurred , I refocus , Oncology ........








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